Happy half-term, everyone!

At the end of September, I was buzzing around school telling everyone about my Halloween countdown calendar. I’d made little activity cards to go in each pouch so we could really go all out this year.

For the first week, it went really well and then, well, life got in the way. Family dramas, extra work commitments, the fact that I couldn’t find any card to print the new activities on. Long story short, I failed.

Summer and I have reflected on the calendar and decided it was too ambitious. Next year, we’ll obviously still have it (it’s beautiful and wasn’t cheap) but instead of activity cards, we’ll pop in a little sweet or a Halloween joke and save the activities for the weekends.

We’re all learning.

Now I’ve admitted that I failed at being a perfect Instagram parent (I doubt that will come as a surprise to many), I will bask in my actual successes. A few months ago, I spent several days researching and finding events for half-term and I’ve booked us up!

No more feeling overwhelmed about how to fill the days. One activity a day and plenty of screen and chill time for the rest of it. Long-time readers will know that it will never actually play out the way I think, but that’s why you read…

We ended Friday with spooky dress-up at school and I got my Halloween dress out (we’ve covered this, I don’t do actual costumes). A few celebratory drinks for the end of term, home for Celebrity Traitors and the weekend had begun.

Saturday morning, our first booked experience. Pumpkin carving in Richmond.

It was swimming first, which has been going much better, but I quickly realised it wasn’t just me who had been counting down to half-term. River was absolutely shattered. More tearful than usual, very clingy and clearly not in the mood for my carefully planned Halloween fun.

I told him we were off to get a pumpkin and he burst into tears, saying he wanted to go home.

I managed to convince him to get on the bus with the absolute promise that we would go home as soon as we’d got our pumpkin. The stormy conditions did not help the general mood.

He likes sitting at the top of the bus and silently stared out of the window for the journey. We sat in Greggs with some crisps, waiting for the other two to join us, and little thoughts of why are we doing this? started to creep in.

They arrived and Summer, in her infinite wisdom, was not wearing a coat. Did I mention the stormy conditions?

Quick parent swap. Kike enjoying the delightful atmosphere in a damp Greggs whilst I ran around trying to find the least expensive clothes shop to buy an emergency coat. Again, not the easiest in Richmond.

We reunited (with new coat) and walked through the rain to a church hall.

It was hot and busy, with lots of children and noise. I immediately wanted to leave so I can only imagine how River felt.

After a long ten-minute wait, we headed into the main room and that was much better. Clearly, the event had had to be moved indoors because of the storm (I wonder how many times I can mention the storm). We were split into two groups. The orange group were carving first and then we’d swap with the purple group for face painting and games.

Pumpkin carving is weird, isn’t it?

It’s really an adult activity. It requires a knife, for goodness’ sake.

I mean, I’ll give it to Summer, she gave it a good go and 45 minutes later she’d half managed an eye without cutting herself.

River had absolutely no idea what was going on.

He silently watched Kike carve away. Kike tried his best to engage him, asking what eyes he wanted, whether the pumpkin should have a happy or scary mouth. He wasn’t screaming or crying. I think he was just tired.

He became more animated during the games section, which surprised me.

There was a game similar to a coconut shy but instead of coconuts there were skulls (obviously).

He threw the first ball and actually knocked two down. The lady gave him the next ball and he paused, then walked up to each skull holding the ball and pushed them off one by one before excitedly screaming, “I did it!” and walking away.

I mean, he wasn’t wrong.

Neither of my children like face painting (Summer used to, but now it’s itchy), so we took our family photo and I came through with my promise to go home.

It was double the fun going back out into the storm (knew I could mention it again) carrying two very heavy pumpkins.

River was so happy to be home and back under his blanket that I decided then and there he would not be leaving the house on Sunday.

Which brings us to Monday.

I did exactly what I said I wouldn’t do and double-booked.

The first was a quiet session at our local museum. The premise was simple enough: walk around and find creepy crawlies. Well, cartoon posters of them with a little fact, tick them off and get a prize.

There was an interactive bit with a member of staff who told some Horrible Histories-type stories about eating mealworms and the infamous Roman poo stick.

River was extremely taken with the activity, much to my surprise, and was determined to find all the posters. Summer on the other hand was immediately distracted by the craft room, so we decided to leave her in there.

We went up and down, running around the quiet museum finding all our creatures, and River was presented with a vampire bookmark (which he did not care for)

It was time to retrieve Summer, who had made friends with a member of staff and was playing some kind of insect-fighting game on a tuff tray covered with coloured rice. (It was Kike’s decision to let her watch Street Fighter.) If you were wondering, the cockroach won.

We wandered home in the rain, stopping for brief shelter in a café. Back home, straight under the blankets with the TV firmly on. Time to rest before round two.

3pm rolled around and it was time to head back out. Luckily the rain had stopped, but River was not happy.

“WE’VE ALREADY BEEN OUT! I WANT TO STAY HOME!”

A perfectly reasonable argument, to be fair. If it had been anything else, I probably would have stayed in, but I was really looking forward to this one.

The Halloween trail at Kew.

Kike managed to make it home in time and off we went. River promptly fell asleep on the bus. He really is very tired.

It turned out to be a good thing, really. I’ve mentioned before about the sheer size of Kew Gardens and the amount you have to walk before you get to the actual place you want to get to.

This was no different. It was quite funny because Summer kept expecting something to jump out at her, but it actually took 25 minutes to get to the start of the trail which didn’t stop me from constantly shouting, ‘Look over there!” every 2 to 3 minutes.

I’d deliberately picked the earliest slot because the website and friends had said the darker it gets, the more ‘spooky’ they make it. As we approached the entrance, AC/DC’s Hells Bells was blaring out and there was a rather imposing headless horseman, with enormous dark shoulders, sitting on a white horse. Very dramatic.

River could not have cared less.

I’m starting to feel that his special interest is fading…

Summer and I were very invested though and promptly entered under the ‘ENTER IF YOU DARE’ sign, which took us through some scary Egyptian pyramids with a rather terrifying mummy.

It was one of those experiences where they had live actors interspersed with mannequins, so you were never sure what was going to move.

There were lots of different themes as you walked round. Witches, gravediggers, vampires, 12-foot skeletons, glowing spiders. It was very impressive.

Summer started to appreciate my choice of the early setting as the sun set and it got dark very quickly. By this point we’d gone through the scariest bit, but we could hear some smaller children crying.

As for River, well, some bits he liked. He loved the luminous spider’s web and he loved shouting out all the characters, but maybe the whole thing altogether was a bit much.

Every time a character tried to interact with him or we pointed for him to come closer, he would shake his head and say, “No, I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all,” and walk on.

Two hours later we were back on the bus and Summer declared, “That’s the coolest thing you’ve ever booked for us.”

Which made me feel great.

River wanted some reassurance that he was going to be allowed to stay home tomorrow.

You can’t win.

That brings us to Tuesday.

River got his wish for the morning but I did make him head out for our one activity, a Halloween show at the local theatre.

Sadie met us as always. She’s not going to miss a Dantastic show, with a plot we can never quite discover and the miraculous ability to use exactly the same songs every time but change the lyrics to match the theme.

Summer has declared that nine is far too old for this, so she chose some snacks and happily sat in the café with her iPad.

River did really well, even though he was dubious at first, declaring he’d already seen the show.

Yes, River, that was last year’s show.

It was very busy and therefore a bit louder than usual, so I had to be his ear defenders at times, but on the whole he jumped and shouted and seemed happy. There was a moment where he was not gifted a high five from any of the 3 cast members but luckily at the end of the show Professor Wizard Pop came through.

It’s really nice how comfortable he is with Sadie. He’ll happily sit and shout at her with his grieviances, which also gives me a little break.

What was interesting was that Sadie had noticed the changes in his behaviour too. She’s known River for a while now, so it was interesting to hear that someone else could see what we’ve been noticing at home.

I’ve mentioned before that we’ve been concerned about some of River’s new behaviours, particularly the episodes where he seems to freeze or become unresponsive. I received a call from the GP, who has decided to make an urgent referral to a neurologist.

I’m becoming increasingly suspicious that some of these episodes could be absence seizures, although I’m sure there are other things going on too. I want to understand what’s happening and make sure anything more serious is ruled out. The thought of something like a tumour is frightening, but I know we don’t have any answers yet and that’s exactly why he needs to be assessed.

I received a message today confirming that our referral has been accepted, so now we wait for the appointment.

It’s another thing to add to the ever-growing list of things to think about, but I’m glad it’s being taken seriously.

And so, half-term continues.

We’ve got a little Halloween party tomorrow but don’t worry, River, it’s at our house. Friday is busy too, so I want to make sure he gets plenty of time at home before the end of the week.

I’ve been hearing from a lot of people that their children aren’t particularly keen on doing much this half-term either, and I think we need to respect that.

I expect a lot from River. He’s started in a new unit, goes to after-school club every day and has swimming lessons at the weekend. He hasn’t had a single day off sick in eight weeks and now he’s heading into another seven-week stretch before Christmas.

It’s a lot for any five-year-old, let alone one who has to work so hard to navigate everyday life. I think sometimes we forget that just because they’re managing doesn’t mean they’re not exhausted by it.

So if he wants to spend a few days under his blanket watching television, I think he’s more than earned it.

Don’t worry they’ll be a Halloween part 2 coming up.